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It isn't easy to monitor our kids' computer use every time they log on to the internet.  Moderating what they are allowed to see online is key in these situations.  My own family uses Content Watch.  The company recently acquired Net Nanny and is constantly working to improve their service.  We have tried a few applications over the past couple of years, but for us, this one has been the best, the easiest to navigate, and the most reliable. 

I really like the control I have over how much or how little my kids can access online and all of the controls are accessible to me from any computer.  I am even able to stipulate the times they are able to use the internet if excessive computer use is becoming an issue.

Although I don't choose to log what they are typing, nor do I read their emails, some parents will prefer this option, and have access to this feature with the Content Watch program.  It is very inclusive in terms of the features that are available and can be customized to suit all parents with kids of any age. 

It is always interesting to me to learn more about the influence we as parents have on our children and their behaviour.  I hope you take the time to read this article entitled, Parenting Styles and It's Correlates. 

A brief summary of the article follows:

Developmental Psychologists stydying the influence parents have on the development of their children, commonly explore the same four styles of parenting.  These four styles include Indulgent, Authoritarian, Authoritative, and Uninvolved. 

Indulgent:  More a friend than a parent, this parent does not place high demands on the child and avoids confrontation.

Authoritarian:  This parent has very high expectations for the child and expects orders to be followed without question.

Authoritative:  This parent has high demands but allows the child to suffer natural consequences.  Is less demanding and more democratic than the authoritarian parent.

Uninvolved:  This parent is rejecting and/or neglectful.

The article goes on to say that findings suggest children being raised in authoritative homes are more likely to do better in school than children of other parenting types.  They are also more likely to have higher self esteem and have better social skills.

Have you ever heard of "Triple P Parenting"?  It stands for the Power of Positive Parenting.   I have read much of the information on this model of parenting and was fortunate enough to be able to attend one of their workshops this evening.

It was a brief workshop that gave a basic overview of the principals behind the model, and I would like to share some of what I learned because I find this model to encompass exactly what I am striving to do. 

Triple P Parenting emphasizes setting a solid set of ground rules for all members of the family, and focuses on putting a positive spin on all areas of interaction with children.  Instead of zoning in on the exasperation and negative thinking that is so easy to fall into when the frustration level begins to climb, we should reamain calm and redirect activities if needed.  This will teach the child natural consequences in terms of not being able to continue an activity when exhibiting undesirable behaviors and allow for an opportunity to play or act more appropriately in a new situation.   These now desirable behaviors should then generate a shower of praise.  Being that we all enjoy being praised for what we are good at, children will be more likely to exhibit more desirable behaviors when presented with a similar situation in the future. 

I love this model of parenting because it focuses on the problem behavior, not a problem child.  I also like how it teaches the child about natural consequences without focusing on a punishment.  It allows the child to own the responsibility of their behavior.

My one concern at the end of the workshop was that many parents could find it difficult to begin incorporating this style of parenting if the home is currently lacking a solid set of expectations for both the parents and children.  It is easy to get lost in the chaos of life and giving in here and there can create havoc when trying to enforce new ground rules that you can stick to. 

The general rule of thumb seems to be to expect things to get worse before they get better.  Children will test their limits, but after a few weeks, there should be a noticeable decline in the number of infractions occurring.  This positive parenting technique will encourage the development of happy, well adjusted kids which is something we all strive for.

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